it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
