butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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