Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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