wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
