You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize