Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
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I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
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My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
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