If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Randomize