By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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