hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
