He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
