I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
