oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Someone shattered a urinal.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Randomize