So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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