Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
