Ketchup is God's man juice
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
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