batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
