dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
