Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
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