I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I feel great
I just peed on a car
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
