carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Who died my cat blue again?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
