I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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