this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
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