i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
