GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Randomize
