If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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