I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
