Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
