you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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