thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Randomize
