Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
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I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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