everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize