And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Bang-toberfest begins!!
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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