The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
