so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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