watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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