Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
