nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
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