Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Randomize
