i permit you to call me
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
