I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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