took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize