OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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