He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I am naked and annoyed.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
