I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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