I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
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The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
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hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
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