That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
