I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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