tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
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