bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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