Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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