so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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