I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Betty ford says i'm here all night
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
tell me about the eggs
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
